Dallas

I came to Dallas in middle school with my brother Josh to visit our Aunt Marie. My dads older sister. We had never met her, only two of her kids, our cousins, Matt and Tiffany. They would visit us occasionally at the farm and I loved them so much. I saw Tiffany last week at Marta's wedding, and she said what she remembers most when I was a boy was that I walked around wearing cowboy boots in my underwear. This really explains so much, and yet I have no recollection of this phase. I was young!

Aunt Marie was a successful doctor in an era when most women would become teachers or nurses. She lived in an upscale neighborhood in Dallas, she had a maid, nice cars and would drop Josh and I off during the day at an amusement park or museum with more money than we had ever seen. She fed us food we had never eaten, gourmet shit. Mexican food. The last day she took us to a place that had onion rings and I got sick from all the new changes in my diet. I even complained to Marie that I didn't like my mom's cooking because it was too plain. Josh quickly defended my mom's cooking while Aunt Marie just uttered her usual direct one liners.

You know, your mom needs to learn how to cook.

Later in the trip she would offer Josh and I crème de menthe and Josh magnanimously protected me from my inevitable corruption. I was bursting to get out of the gates and try everything life had to offer. Marie loved her dogs more than anything and when Rudy her Doberman was driving in the front seat and started peeing everywhere I thought Marie would have a meltdown. She just laughed hysterically as if it was the cutest thing she had ever seen.

I would get to spend more time with Marie as I got older and I started to feel a strong connection to her. She loved tennis and invited me to the US open in NYC one year. Unfortunately the tennis got rained out but I got to spend lots of time with Tiffany and Marie. They took me to an upscale restaurant and made me order something I had never tried before(skate), took me for Indian food and brunch before I had to train it back home. Marie even came one year for Thanksgiving, where she cooked our family a Thanksgiving feast. Gourmet Thanksgiving of course.

 I will never forget her bursting into the kitchen, it was right after 9-11 and Marie although highly educated would say outlandish things. Like I don't know what all these Muslim people are doing praying, I mean they are just going to get dizzy. I found her hilarious, inappropriate and surprisingly tender hearted after everything was said and done. I had to leave the kitchen after Marie and my parents started in on the abortion debate.

Marie died of liver cancer in Tampa over ten years ago and she was such a strong, hard working woman. She was getting chemo therapy and still working at the hospital, one day she was too weak to walk to her car and had to use the wall to get herself there and when a coworker asked to help her, she refused. She was proud and strong until the end. I got to go to her funeral and still think of her fondly and miss her larger than life personality. She raised three successful, bright people who now have a total of 8 or 9 kids. She was a wonderful woman, full of tenacity and flaws and lived a great life. I remember her telling me if she had to do it over again she would of become an artist. She loved going to Asia and the simplicity of places like Burma. She got into making day of the dead dolls and made them with great attention to detail and she was a hell of a cook. So I think she got to see some of her dream come true.

So now, being back in Dallas about 20 years later for a tennis tournament, I really wanted to win not just for me, but for Marie too, who would of liked to see me do well and  probably would have had some great advice for me, like ya know, you just need to hit the ball.

This one is for you Marie.